Tenderness Tapers Tempers

A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. – (Proverbs 15:1, NIV)

A gentle answer makes anger disappear, but a rough answer makes it grow. – (Proverbs 15:1, ERV)

A gentle response defuses anger, but a sharp tongue kindles a temper-fire. – (Proverbs 15:1, MSG)

A tender answer turns away rage, but a prickly reply spikes anger. – (Proverbs 15:1, VOICE)

This is always a good reminder, as opportunities to gently reply are abundant, particularly when we want to respond in hurt or anger. No truer words have been penned, as when we respond in anger or with harsh or sarcastic words, it only inflames the situation. However, when we pause, take a deep breath, and respond with kindness and gentleness, there is a softening in the exchange that could have gone terribly wrong. We never know what has led to an interaction that begins poorly, yet we can control how we reply. Each time that I have caught myself and checked my heart to answer as I am called to do, I see tangible evidence of God’s love working on my behalf, as tension lessens and calm comes. It seems that one of the most difficult spaces to respond gently is on the road. There is something in many of us that rises up when other drivers make foolish maneuvers. Years ago, I had a great friend who would yell out, “Bless you, in Jesus’ Name! Or Jesus loves you!” whenever another driver would cut him off or jeopardize his safety. It may seem silly, but every time, it has the power to transform the mindset of anger and frustration, and causes a pause that allows for the brain to catch up to the heart to adjust enough to recognize that we all make mistakes and grace goes a long way. This mindset really is transformative in all situations and circumstances. Though it may not be opportune to always yell out a blessing, it is always useful and beneficial to pause and seek to see others through God’s lens. As we do, grace is abundant and good is given. May we ever seek the Lord to show us how to respond gently, and to grant a heart check when we are determined to do otherwise.

A tender reply,

Brings grace where it’s not;

Defuses the fire,

When tempers are hot.

An unkind response,

Only provokes rage;

Yet true gentleness,

Shows others the way.

The way to give love,

Despite what we feel;

God’s kindness breathes life,

Makes His goodness real.

Lord, help us rise up,

Seek to always love;

To respond like You,

Our Father above.

Dear Heavenly Father, thank You that You call us to respond gently, despite what we are given. Thank You that gentleness brings a calm where rage was rising. Forgive us for the times that we have responded in anger rather than with grace. Teach us to rely on You to show us how to respond with tenderness. Show us how to love those around us, even when love is far from what we desire to extend. May many come into a lasting relationship with You, as they recognize the gentleness and grace that You have waiting no matter the condition in which they come to You. Be glorified O God, as we seek You to show us how to respond to others with tenderness and grace, extending Your love and kindness to the seemingly least deserving. Amen.

© Shannon Elizabeth Grabrick and Revelations in Writing, May 2011 – present

Hatred stirs up conflict, but love covers over all wrongs. – Proverbs 10:12

Gentle Answers

A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. – (Proverbs 15:1, NIV) 

A gentle answer makes anger disappear, but a rough answer makes it grow. – (Proverbs 15:1, ERV) 

A gentle answer defuses anger, but a sharp tongue kindles a temper-fire. – (Proverbs 15:1, MSG) 

How can we answer gently defuse the anger that is ravaging our cities? I wish I had the perfect answer that would restore order and peace. However, I recognize that there is no simple answer nor quick fix. This morning, I came across a powerful message from a woman of color , Nicole Walters, who gave me far deeper insight into what is going on. What if the protesting that has turned violent by some comes from a long-standing space of grief? Grief for the way that the world perceives individuals, based solely on the color of their skin. What if, after a lifetime of both observing and living this reality, the one more thing brought an end to the quiet peaceful ways of seeking right where so much is wrong, and what we are witnessing is screaming for our attention? No longer can we stay silent. We must listen and learn. In the same way the colonists attempted to peacefully right the wrongs imposed by authorities subjecting the citizens to unfair taxes, by letter writing, petitioning, and the like, they hit a point of being ignored, unheard, for far too long, and The Boston Tea Party took place. Rather than continue to be taxed on tea, they snuck aboard the ship and threw that tea into the harbor. Fires were ablaze, and civil unrest rose up. Enough was enough. What is going on now, is not so different. Preventable tragedies and gross atrocities continue to take place against people of color, and enough is enough. No, looting is not the answer, yet it has certainly demanded our attention. Each one of us needs to look at our own lens, and recognize where cleaning needs to occur. Sometimes, the lack of clarity of our view, comes from an unintentional ignorance. The more we know, the better we can become at loving our neighbors, our brothers and sisters, the way that God intended. Love always protects. If we begin to listen and learn and answer gently, with the wisdom and grace that God provides, then perhaps the anger will be defused and peace may begin to be restored. This begins with me. I love deeply, and value everyone. That being said, I must be intentional to become more aware, and learn how to love better. This is not meant to be some sort of soap box post, but rather one of recognition and repentance for not knowing what I have not clearly known. As a woman who loves Jesus, a mother, a teacher, and a friend, change begins with me. There is always more to learn to do better and be better. My job demands that I listen and learn, evolve and grow – in each of my roles; for each position give me a unique voice and the ability to impact those around me. May we seek the Lord for wisdom as we are intentional to listen and learn, so that we may act justly, love mercy, and walk humbly with God as we are called. 

O Lord, here am I, 

On true bended knees; 

Asking for wisdom, 

So I clearly see. 

Please open my eyes, 

To where I’ve been blind; 

Lead me to better, 

Show me Your design. 

Help me to act justly, 

To love with mercy; 

May I humbly walk, 

Promote equity. 

Dear Heavenly Father, thank You that You continue to grow us as we are willing to listen and learn. Thank You that You have created each of us with gifts and talents to share with and positively impact the world. Forgive us for our ignorance or places where we have not viewed the world through Your lens. Teach us to continue to intentionally learn and grow, so that we may more clearly reflect Your love and light unto the world. Show us how to love those around us best, so that all people feel valued, heard, and known. May many come into a lasting relationship with You. Be glorified O God, as we seek to listen and learn, so that we may always answer gently and help defuse anger with love. Amen. 

© Shannon Elizabeth Grabrick and Revelations in Writing, May 2011 – present

Human, the Lord has told you what goodness is. This is what He wants from you: Be fair to other people. Love kindness and loyalty, and humbly obey your God. – Micah 6:8

Grow Not Weary in Doing Good

Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. – (Galatians 6:9, NIV)

We must not get tired of doing good. We will receive our harvest of eternal life at the right time. We must not give up. – (Galatians 6:9, ERV)

So, let’s not allow ourselves to get fatigued doing good. At the right time we will harvest a good crop if we don’t give up, or quit. – (Galatians 6:9, MSG)

 

We are called to give as we have been given. God has shown us what it is to do good – to walk in the light of His love before all others, for as we do, they too may come to know Him. The “not giving up” part can often be the biggest challenge. It can become exhausting to extend God’s goodness and grace to those who are unkind or rude to those around them. Daily, this is a portion of my reality, as kids are seeking to discover their way. Keeping calm and seeking to understand first, can be quite arduous when that which is directed at others is intended for harm. Often, when harsh words or unkind actions are met with calm words, a change in behavior occurs. Though it does not change the trajectory of the path they are on, repeated kindness, goodness and grace, can begin to wear away and the tough exterior that acts out. Ultimately, persistent good extended, changes us, even if it does not adjust attitudes of those around us. We are called to persevere on the path He has placed before us, depending on Him to love others as we are loved by Him. May we ever persist in doing good, for at the right time, we will receive His reward, regardless of the response of those around us.

 

Let’s not grow weary,

Photo by Dee Jones of Open Door Photography ❤

In choosing do good;

For we’re called to give,

God’s love, understood.

Without conditions,

May we extend grace;

Love and God’s kindness,

To all in our space.

For if we persist,

God says He’ll reward;

Faith to choose follow,

Walk in one accord.

So, do not give up,

When love seems too hard;

God will be our strength,

His grace, our reward.

 

Dear Heavenly Father, thank You that You have shown us what it is to do good without giving up through the life, death and resurrection of Your Son. Though persecuted, pursued, and ultimately hung on a cross, Jesus chose to give love and grace, according, to Your perfect plan. Forgive us for not extending good when we receive unkindness, as You do not intend us to repay evil with evil. Help us to seek You for strength to respond and reach out in the opposite spirit of those intending anything other than good. Show us how to love those around us in practical ways. May many come into a lasting relationship with You. Be glorified O God, as we choose to do good, regardless of how we feel in the moment. Amen.

 

© Shannon Elizabeth Grabrick and Revelations in Writing, May 2011 – present

 

It (love) always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. – 1 Corinthians 13:7

Gentleness Makes Love Tangible

Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. – (Philippians 4:5, NIV)

Let your gentleness show in your treatment of all people. The Lord is near. – (Philippians 4:5, CEB)

Keep your gentle nature so that all people will know what it looks like to walk in His footsteps. The Lord is ever present with us. – (Philippians 4:5, VOICE)

Let gentleness be seen in every relationship, for our Lord is ever near. – (Philippians 4:5, TPT)

 

Gentleness is a vehicle for kindness that makes love tangible. God loves us fiercely, but so often makes His love known through the gentleness of those whom He places in our lives. A kind word, a gentle gesture or a small, sweet sentiment extended toward us, make us feel seen and known and loved. We are called to allow gentleness to be seen in and through us in every relationship. God equips and empowers us to extend grace and kindness to all, even the seemingly undeserving. Just as we have received His gentleness when our thoughts, words or actions warranted quite the opposite, so too, are we to allow the very same gentleness to be evident through us. May we seek the Lord and His love for all to fill our hearts so that His gentleness may be seen in our every interaction with those around us.

 

Let sweet gentleness,

Photo by Dee Jones of Open Door Photography ❤

Be easy to see;

For kindness given,

Sets captive hearts free.

Because God is love,

We know tenderness;

A word, deed or touch,

In our brokenness.

So, let us choose too,

Be gentle and kind;

Such things soften hearts,

And soothe troubled minds.

The Lord’s ever near,

With kindness and grace;

Fill with gentleness,

So love is in place.

 

Dear Heavenly Father, thank You that You not only call us to extend gentleness to others, but empower and equip us to love as You love each of us. Forgive us for the times that we have not been gentle with ourselves and with those around us, as each of us are loved and valued beyond measure by You. Give us Your eyes to see one another as You do, so that we are better able to allow gentleness to be our mode of operation as we interact. Show us how to love others with the same kindness and gentleness that You make so evident to us. May many come into a lasting relationship with You. Be glorified O God, as we extend gentleness in our words, thoughts and actions to all whom we meet. Amen.

 

 

© Shannon Elizabeth (Moreno) Grabrick and Revelations in Writing, May 2011 – present

 

A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. – Proverbs 15:1

Gentle Answers Abolish Anger

A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. – (Proverbs 15:1, NIV)

A gentle answer makes anger disappear, but a rough answer makes it grow. – (Proverbs 15:1, ERV)

A tender answer turns away rage, but a prickly reply spikes anger. – (Proverbs 15:1, VOICE)

 

God has placed me in a field where I have the opportunity to put this truth into practice daily. Teens tend to have short fuses, and carry frustration until it finds a foothold so large, that it can no longer be contained. The vast majority of the time, I find that if I speak calm, kind words, and give the student room to have a voice, (appropriately) whatever anger had begun to rage, begins to dissipate as quickly as it had onset. It is no different for adults. When we are already riled up about something, how someone interacts with us, matters. If we are treated with kindness and gentleness, whatever spiked our fury, somehow lessens, and rational thought returns to our heart and mind so that we are able to communicate like civilized human beings. May our every response be gentle and kind, so that we are agents of peace rather than proponents of rage.

 

O Lord, help my words,

Be gentle and kind;

Words that diffuse rage,

That render hate blind.

May wrath turn away,

With kindness spoken;

Let Your love pour out,

To hurt and broken.

Grant me Your answers,

With love as I speak;

So peace will be known,

And anger made weak.

 

Dear Heavenly Father, thank You that You give us guidance in Your word that shows us how to live and love well. Thank You that gentle answers come from You, if we seek You for strength and direction when angry words or actions move in our direction. Forgive us for reacting in our own rage and making things worse, rather than responding gently to diffuse displeasure. Teach us to trust You more, so that we would stop and breathe before we respond to someone who is enraged. Give us Your words to speak gently, so that we may turn away wrath, rather than make it grow. Show us how to love others, even in their fits of frustration, just as You love us. May many come into a lasting relationship with You. Be glorified O God, as we depend on You to equip us with gentle answers to help diffuse anger that comes our way. Amen.

© Shannon Elizabeth Moreno and Revelations in Writing, May 2011 – present

But because of His great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ. – Ephesians 2:4-5

Encouraging Words

image by beliefnet.com

In weariness, worn;

a frustrated rant.

No harsh words spoken;

only grace to grant.

Child-like complaining,

met with tenderness.

Encouraging words,

brought peace in my mess.

God’s kind heart to mine,

on the face of friends;

He restores all hope,

as His love extends.

Reminders of truth,

when it’s hard to see;

His grace is greater,

than what comes at me.

As strength is renewed,

and faith rises up,

I am encouraged;

for He is enough.

“May our Lord Jesus Christ Himself and God our Father, who loved us and by His grace gave us eternal encouragement and good hope, encourage your hearts and strengthen you in every good deed and word.” – (2 Thessalonians 2:16-17)

Dear Heavenly Father, thank You for Your goodness and grace. Thank You that You are our loving Father who patiently waits out our frustrations and complaining, and You tenderly take our hand and heart, and remind us that You are holding us in Your strong hands. Thank You that You are far greater than anything that can ever come against us. Forgive us for our tirades in trying times, and help our immediate response be to turn to trust in You. Thank You for Your love, grace and kindness that You make tangible through others, so that we might gain a greater glimpse of You. May we be strengthened and encouraged as we seek You alone, and may others clearly see You in us, as we respond to Your great and generous love. Lead us and guide us I pray, and bring many to know Your way. Amen.

© Shannon Elizabeth Moreno and Revelations in Writing, May 2011 – present